decisions decisions...

I am so torn about what to do with my future in terms of where to live and when. Its such a difficult decision. Should I move back to Spain ASAP or wait and reap the benefits of staying longer later on in my (our) life. Obviously its something that Spanish guy and I have to discuss, but its something that I think about everyday because we really are having a hard time deciding... and need to come to some sort of conclusion pretty soon. Time is running out... tick tock tick tock. ugh.

Who knew marriage could be so complicated. My moon is in Libra, I cant make decisions! lol.

cuteness & writing.

handsomeness.

sophistication. 

I dont feel like writing too much today on blogger, 

I filled my journal up with nine pages this afternoon... thats enough. 

achuu

I'm sick. I got sick. ugh... but I'm curing myself. Hopefully I'll be back in business tomorrow.

What I'm thankful for

On this Thanksgiving, I'm thankful for the following:

• My mothers health
• my husband, so understanding & funny
• my family in general
• my wonderful friends, who are there for me no matter what
• the luxury of being able to do whatever I want
• not having any responsibilities in life & making the right decisions throughout my whole life
• for having a roof over my head
• for great co-workers and meaningful work
• being able to run and travel (my health)
• and every little thing that fills me with inspiration and love on a daily basis.

life simply put

As time goes by, I get happier and happier. My life gets better and better. Of course there are those moments where you just feel like nothing is working out for you, or you had a "bad day", but overall, I spend the majority of my time with lovely people, smiling, laughing, having fun, and doing interesting things.

My whole life I've been on a quest for happiness, maybe because I was so unhappy as a teen. I knew that I never wanted to get to that place in my life again, so I started changing, changing my clothing, changing my body, changing my friends, I changed my house, I went to school, I traveled, I met great people-- young and old, and I started to become curious about the world... asking questions, exploring, learning languages, touching, smelling, appreciating...

I started caring about people and and most importantly, I began caring about myself.

So today, all these years later, with one month to go until my 30th birthday. I have to say that I found happiness--  I am happy with the people and environment around me right now.

But most importantly, I've found happiness within myself. And thats where it's always been.

A couple that plays together, stays together.

We woke up early on Saturday to seize the day. 

After enjoying a leisurely breakfast on our cute bistro table, we headed up to Prospect Park. Saturday is soccer day for Spanish guy. We walked up through Park Slope together, when we arrived,  I said hi to all the soccer players then went for a jog around the park (it was nice to just be able to jog, not "train", so I was happy). Afterwards we walked through the Park, passed the lake, hopped over horse manurer, kicked the leaves around, skipped hand-in-hand, laughed and afterward got a hot chocolate to warm ourselves up for the walk home.

It was so plesant. I don't think we knew how important it was to be in nature and play together. It really made us happy and it set the tone for the rest of the weekend...

Occupy Wall Street: 2 months on

I went marching through the streets of NYC today. SHUTTING THE CITY DOWN! STOPPING CARS, BLOCKING ALL KINDS OF TRAFFIC. This is what a social movement should be. Make politicans so uncomfortable that they are forced to make change!


My students were with me too. They are making a documentary on the income gap and how it creates a cycle of poverty and wealth. They're using the protests as the "backbone" of their doc <-- this is their own words, LOVE IT! 


Here's my question: Why should the rich get richer (and get tax cuts) while the rest of ours stagger?

LETS CREATE A JUST SOCIETY!
LETS OCCUPY!
Non violent protest. Keep it alive.

freedom...

This is how I want to live my life: in the sunshine, freely riding my bike or running by the sea, feeling the mist of the salt water as I pass with not a care in the world. Smiling all the time and being okay with not knowing where the universe will take me.

<3

DC, life and back to normality

I really enjoyed being out in DC this past weekend. It was great to see one of my long-term friends, and it was nice to be able to show Spanish guy my nations' capital. Every night that we were there we went to a house party. The first night was a going-away party in a chic remodeled condo in a trendy area of DC, and the second night we went to a potluck dinner in the Capital District. I wanted to die I ate so much that night! ha.

Spanish guy wasn't too impressed with the white house. When he saw it, he said "thats it"? And the truth is I kinda agree with him. Theres really nothing super impressive about it when you see it in person. Its just a HUGE American symbol, and "thats it".

(my digital camera battery died the first day so I had to buy a disposable, remember those? haha. The pictures are getting developed as I type.)

oh yeah, and we went on a private tour of the National Gallery of Art with American University Alumni. I was SUPER impressed with the Chester Dale collection. Best group of paintings I've ever seen anywhere... Below is the patio, very Spanish/European. We Loved walking through the Gallery hand-in-hand taking in the art. nice.

So now we are back in NYC. I started back at the gym again, in my fight club class, and I've been running a half mile here and there, just to maintain my running muscles. Besides that, nothing. Things are pretty normal in my life, and I have to say, I don't like normality.

Something has to change, and soon.

Now what?

oh boy, it's gunna be a long ride!

On our way to DC (with Spanish Guy). What great company I have on this five-hour journey! NOT! lol 

Now what?

the NYC marathon-- my story

I was nervous as I sat in a patch of moist grass in Staten Island, luckily I had my phone on me-- a blackberry look-a-like and communicated with my friends through Facebook. I was tagged in so many posts that morning: "Good luck Mendoza! I hope that God gives u strength 2 finish the race. And that u feel the love from ur friends & family there cheering u on & those doing so in spirit.", "Would like to wish my friend Mendoza the best of luck on running the Marathon today. She will be running for the American Cancer society. May God guide her through her journey and give her the strength she needs to go all the way!! Im very proud of you girl!!", "Run hard Mendoza!!"... in between my facebook sessions I called my mom and then my dad to tell them I was nervous. They both said I would do great and if I feel like I'm going to die, then stop. <-- like all parents would say, ha.

Then the announcement came, in about four different languages. "WAVE THREE RUNNERS, PLEASE MAKE YOUR WAY TO THE START LINE", "ONDA tres corredores, por favor haga su camino a la línea de salida", "WAVE trois coureurs, S'IL VOUS PLAÎT faire votre chemin vers la ligne de départ", "WAVE GUIDE TRE, SI PREGA DI EFFETTUARE IL VOSTROMODO alla linea di partenza"-- or something like that. so I got up, and quickly walked over.

The sun was bright. I felt warm, I starting doing light stretching-- but it was difficult to move because there were so many runners surrounding me, we were packed in tight. After about 30 minutes of waiting, a beautiful voice began singing the star spangled banner... OH SAY CAN YOU SEE... I got a lump in my throat... BOOM... the cannon was fired and Frank Sinatras' "New York, New York" came on. Tears rolled out of my eyes, the lump just stood there, in my throat, making it hard to swallow.

And thats how I began the New York City Marathon, 2011.

The rest of the experience went by really quick, even though I was running for almost five hours, it felt like one hour. I saw lots of people I knew along the way. There were signs with my name on them along the route-- my friends came from Queens and Long Island to see me. It was amazing. I definitely felt the love and support.

The last six miles, I was in excruciating pain. My legs felt horrible, I hadn't trained well (the longest I had run in the past few weeks was ten miles, and I was already at mile 20 without stopping). It was surreal. Although I experienced this pain, I was on top of the world! I felt like, "If I could accomplish this without training, imagine what else I could do with my life". My mind was strong, guiding me, and so was my body.

I had soul.

I felt it. I felt my spirit throughout that whole course, beginning with Staten Island, then in Brooklyn, then running through Queens, into Manhattan, then to the Bronx, then back to Manhattan to finish strong. My spirit was with me that whole time-- and I'm sure that the people I was running in memory of were too.

Unforgettable experience.

Now what?

Victory: NYC Marathon, 2011

VICTORY!

I finished the NYC Marathon, 2011 in four hours and forty-nine minutes! SO much faster than I thought I would.

I didn't train as I should have. The longest run I did was 13 miles in July, and I ran 26.2 miles without stopping! I couldn't believe it! But the truth is, the day before, I did an easy 2 miles and it hit me, I KNEW that I would run the marathon AND be successful, even though I didn't train, I FELT it, and when I feel something, its usually true! AND I DID!

This was the third time in my life I cried for joy.

One day I wont be able to run a marathon, 

YESTERDAY WASN'T THAT DAY!

go Mendoza GO!

ING NYC Marathon, 2011

So happy with all my accomplishments. More blogs soon related to this!

One year ago: engagement party

Last year at this time Spanish guy and I had our engagement party. 

Boy oh boy, how the time flies.

Every year there is new excitement in my life! I LOVE it!

Here I go!

Tomorrow is the big day. I feel good about it. No matter what, I'm doing this for a great cause and I know this is going to be one of the BIGGEST experiences of my life!

NYC MY HOMETOWN!

How proud I am to run through my own streets.

woo hoo!

got my number at the Jacob Javits Center

the Determination ACS wall at the marathon expo

at the NYC marathon expo

the marathon eve dinner.

HERE WE GO!

Running emotions

Growing up in Park Slope, I used to watch the thousands of NYC marathon runners go by on brisk Sunday mornings once a year. I would slap them five, hand out paper-towels so they can wipe their sweat and cheer them on! I always thought, "WOW", one day I want to do that...

Now, in three days, I will. 

last training run before the marathon 11/1/11

I started out running the Belfast marathon in 2007, then ran the Madrid Marathon in 2009, now I'm on to the NYC marathon of 2011! Every two years I run a marathon in a different country, BUT this time its different. This time I'll be pounding the pavement in my hometown, NEW YORK CITY, passing by my people, my neighbors, friends and family. This time I'll be running through my old neighborhood and I'll remember when I used to stand there watching everyone else, now I'll be on the other side.

Its more important this time because I'll be running with the memory of loved ones that passed away from some form of cancer. I'll be running with the hopes of raising my fundraising goal of $3,500 so that less people have to suffer. So far, I'm proud to say, with the help of my dearest friends and family, I've raised $2,200. I still need $1,300 more. (Can you help me?)

Click here to like this cause on Facebook

Click here to donate now

The other morning as I was on the train riding over the bridge, I logged onto facebook and found such supportive, encouraging messages from my friends, I got a lump in my throat. This whole process has been so emotional for me, especially because my mom recently survived her 2nd bout with cancer.

I'm lucky to still have her, and I'm lucky to have supportive people in my life, and it makes me feel good that even people I never met are donating to my fund.

I hope to see you all along the route on Sunday. Wish me luck!